back to the real world.

I made it back from Las Vegas, and have been sick since I landed in Houston. Apparently sin city doesn't sit well with my respiratory system. I've spent the last 24hrs attempting to breath out my nose. This week will be extremely busy so I should probably attempt to go to bed early. *gulps down NyQuil*

Being in Las Vegas brought me to a lot of conclusions... Mainly, that I have truly evolved. The me from 10 years ago probably would have loved the idea of roaming around Vegas drunk and in 4inch stilettos, but the current me, isn't really into the wild drunken party scene. I don't like inhaling cigarette smoke, so the casinos were a no-go, although I did win some money at a slot machine in between a conference session, I was trying not to inhale too much second-hand smoke....my alcohol tolerance is also definitely not what it use to be. Two drinks and I'm out....

What I need to do is work on coming out of my shell. I hate networking. I hate rubbing elbows. I hate having meaningless conversations with people I don't really know. Yes, I know. I'm an attorney, and in my industry, social skills can be the missing ingredient to seal the deal on a lot of things. But I really just hate it. Maybe there is some type of class I can take get over this....

In the midst of watching all the "end of the world" coverage on the news while I was away, I got to thinking about what and who I would genuinely miss if I didn't make it back to Houston in enough time to beat "the rapture." Aside from my family, my boyfriend and a small handful of friends..I realized that I have a lot of meaningless relationships I have been holding on to in my life. I really have become suspicious of a lot of people in my supposed inner circle. Maybe I'm on the verge of a season change, and a lot of people are not going to be joining me in this next season of life...or I really just have nothing in common with some of the people I have known for decades. I have some valuable friendships that have grown over the years, but then I am overwhelmed with the nagging sensation that some of the people I have been associating myself with have met expiration dates. I feel like I'm going in a different direction than a lot of people. One of my friends put it best today when I mentioned to him how I have been feeling lately and his response definitely made me feel better about the situation. He said that he was on a personal journey, and that God moves in silence. I kind of feel like I am on that same sort of personal journey. I only need to hear the voice of God right now, and if you are not speaking of Him then in my mind your voice needs to be silenced. Those who remain after the journey is over, will have been genuine connections, those who are not there will just have to be considered casualties. It's funny. I use to think I couldn't survive a day without my ex boyfriend, and now that I have completely removed him from my life, I live effortlessly without him. It's a wonderful feeling. I imagine it will be the same when other people are removed from my life.

Anyway...the summer is upon us, and I hope I can find some fun activities to partake in to get me through the hot and humid days that are better known as Hell..or Houston in the summer. Hopefully a concert or event will come on the scene sooner than later. Unfortunately, my NyQuil is starting to cloud my thoughts, so I will succumb to it's powers and go to bed. Back to the real world in the morning........