From 2001 to 2009, I was in a very destructive relationship. The height of that destruction for me was in 2003 until the time I graduated from college in Fall of 2004. When I would drive from Baton Rouge to Thibadeux, Louisiana for my internship class, I'd listen to Me, Myself and I by Beyonce on repeat the entire ride there...then when Destiny's Child released there next album, I leaned on the song Bad Habits. I can still vividly remember driving on campus with the song blaring in the background. Although it would be years before I completely removed myself from the situation, those songs did give me a small ounce of inspiration that one day I would get over things and I'm happy that to an extent I have.
It's hard moving on. Even now I struggle with the past. I'm looking for inspiration now, that will help me forget about the past. It's my truest prayer right now. I still struggle with issues that were created then, and I promise I don't want to cling to this forever. I want to move on and be happy. Lord please give me a clean slate, wipe my memory clean of all the pain so I can truly be happy with the person I am with.
Girl, I honestly feel this so deep and so true as I can truly empathize with the feeling of needing to be given the ability to just move on. I have never been in a relationship with a man like that and for some reason I did not realize that you were in that relationship for so many years! That is a lot! However, it is just good that God granted you the strength to be able to walk away and also that has blessed you with new things to make you oh so happy! I will keep you in prayer and hope that one day you will look up and not only know, but also feel that it is truly all behind you! xoxo! :o)
ReplyDelete